is not something that has been coming to me easily lately. As I lay awake, unable to quiet all the thoughts in my head, I decided to seek Truth on the issue of forgiveness. I decided I can't just sit and wait for the pain to go away. I can't just sit and wait to suddenly be ok with everything that has happened. It doesn't work that way. Forgiveness is hard, but it shouldn't be so hard. This is what I have found as I decided to get off my butt and learn about the thing I am being called to do.
In Matthew 18: 21-22 Jesus speaks very clearly on the issue of forgiveness.
"Then Peter came to him and asked, 'Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?' 'No, not seven times,' Jesus replied, 'but seventy times seven!'
When I read this, it all sounds good in theory. When I have to apply this, I tend to struggle... a lot! However, Christ is very clear in his expectations. I think it is so hard for me to grasp because I am so tired of getting hurt. I feel that every time I forgive, I give permission for a person to hurt me all over again. This only leads to deep bitterness. That is a scary place.
Who are we not to forgive one another? Did God not forgive us far more than seventy-seven times? The bible is also very clear in this issue. Matthew 6: 14-15 says this...
"If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins."
So you see, forgiveness is not just a nice suggestion. Forgiveness is a demand because we have been forgive ourselves. You see, as Christians, forgiveness is required of us. And it should be! I think about all the bad in my life... and there is a lot... and I can't bear the thought that God has to bear witness to all of my sin, every moment of every day. I break His heart repeatedly. I fail more than I would ever want to admit. I complain about being hurt by others... but I have broken God's heart. I have done so much in my life, and I will continue to fail as long as I live on this earth... but I am forgiven. I am talking 100% forgiven. It can't be taken away from me. Christ gave his own life that I may be forgiven! I can't comprehend it, but it happened. So, again I ask myself... who am I to not forgive another?
Of course, forgiveness is very hard for me. I struggle with it. I find that the longer I hold off on fully forgiving others, the deeper it goes. I find myself growing, not in my walk, but in my bitterness. What an awful thing to be filled with. I think many believers find themselves in the same position after they have been hurt. It is certainly very easy to fall into. So, how does one overcome bitterness, allowing them to truly forgive? It is actually rather simple...
Matthew 5:44
"But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!"
Simple! Pray for those who hurt you. I have been told by more than one person that prayer is the best way to overcome bitterness. It is hard to have bitterness toward someone you are praying for. This is still a hard lesson to learn, and one I am having to remind myself of constantly, but I am beginning to understand the process of forgiveness. This has lead me to become increasingly grateful for all of the forgiveness I have already received!! What a beautiful thing.
